Saturday: So my grandmother finally left her ailing corporeal form on Saturday morning. To be fair, I thought it was just a matter of time because she wasn't looking that well when I last saw her at reunion dinner.
Because it was so sudden, I imagine that it must've put a damper on people's plans (if they had any) - I had a ticket to Gold Rain and Hailstones that night (which I got to exchange for another performance for a nominal fee and it was SOLD OUT), one uncle was in JB... I don't know about anyone else.
To be honest, I was kinda dreading the funeral ceremony based on what I heard about my grandfather's funeral all those years ago (I was in the US then) - it was a long drag of a Taoist ceremony. I was expecting this to be no different. Especially with my dad being the eldest son.
The 'rents got us (the sibling and I) rooms at a nearby homestay because having at least a dozen people and only one bathroom in the whole place is not pretty and they knew we (I mean my bro) hated that situation growing up.
Sunday: The wake where people came to pay their respects, etc. Mum's siblings came by, as well as some of Dad's friends, colleagues, etc. As the "senior" daughter in law, Mum had to offer a portion of the food to her late mother in law before anyone else could eat.
The funeral rites were LONG. Most of my other cousins either grew up with her and/or had a better relationship with her than I (or my bro) did. I would like to think they were tearing up because she passed, but it's probably because of the billowing joss stick smoke, etc. One cousin was noticeably absent because he just had a kid and it was just bad ju-ju in general.Luckily for me, my Mandarin comprehension was (still is, TBH) shit because I don't really know what was going on even though the group conducting the prayer had a LED signboard with erm, surtitles for the spectators (almost the whole town showed up like they had nothing better to do on a Sunday night) to follow along.
I don't know if the people conducting the ceremony really knew their lines or were lip syncing, but wow, the waterworks... Several sessions over several hours. Tiring was an understatement.
The ceremony ended with us lugging all the paper money and stuff we were supposed to burn at a nearby open area and not looking back as we walked away. We only finished this portion of the ceremony after midnight. I was just ready to crash because the funeral starts at 10 a.m next day.
The catered meals were not too bad, I guess, under the circumstances. The auntie cooking them had A LOT of erm, wisdom, to share.
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| Sure got people buy the "registration number" for 4D already... |
Monday: More ceremony and at one point I slipped, landed wrong and my right arm hurt like a MOFO and I couldn't drive at all.
One of my mum's first cousins came and joined in the final walk around the kampung (he was carrying our bags and stuff) before we went off to Semenyih. The route was closed to usual traffic. My bro (as "senior" grandson even though I'm my dad's firstborn - yay for sexism?) and even a cousin-in-law (my aunt's eldest son-in-law) had to lead the procession with my dad and his siblings.
Because of my arm, I didn't join them in the burial process at the plot on the hill. But my bio-aunt joined us in Semenyih (who was noticeably upset when she came by on Saturday night because grandma had been her last living bio-parent).
After she was finally laid to rest (finally occupying the space next to the grandfather), we all travelled back, mandi bunga, had a bit of hair trimmed off (or else cannot get hair cut for 100 days or something like that). And apparently my bro missed the part/memo where we were supposed to dispose of the sweaty, unwashed mourning outfits we had been wearing (for a night and day straight, mind you) before we got back. (Which I only found out from some of the cousins at a gas station on the way back; changing with a sprained arm was a PITA)
But it was time for me and the sibling to head back to PJ because it was too early to eat the provided meal for dinner. Stopped for dinner on the way home at the infamous halal CKT in SS3.
All in all, there was a lot of missed and mixed messages and it was chaotic AF. It was also hot and miserable for this candle princess. And I'm sick and tired of regular 100 Plus now.
One of my mum's first cousins came and joined in the final walk around the kampung (he was carrying our bags and stuff) before we went off to Semenyih. The route was closed to usual traffic. My bro (as "senior" grandson even though I'm my dad's firstborn - yay for sexism?) and even a cousin-in-law (my aunt's eldest son-in-law) had to lead the procession with my dad and his siblings.
Because of my arm, I didn't join them in the burial process at the plot on the hill. But my bio-aunt joined us in Semenyih (who was noticeably upset when she came by on Saturday night because grandma had been her last living bio-parent).
After she was finally laid to rest (finally occupying the space next to the grandfather), we all travelled back, mandi bunga, had a bit of hair trimmed off (or else cannot get hair cut for 100 days or something like that). And apparently my bro missed the part/memo where we were supposed to dispose of the sweaty, unwashed mourning outfits we had been wearing (for a night and day straight, mind you) before we got back. (Which I only found out from some of the cousins at a gas station on the way back; changing with a sprained arm was a PITA)
But it was time for me and the sibling to head back to PJ because it was too early to eat the provided meal for dinner. Stopped for dinner on the way home at the infamous halal CKT in SS3.
All in all, there was a lot of missed and mixed messages and it was chaotic AF. It was also hot and miserable for this candle princess. And I'm sick and tired of regular 100 Plus now.
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